Below are some words taken from this important work of Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakur regarding Association.

It has been seen that many fortunate souls have given up attachment for prejudices by association of pure Vaisnvas. From the scriptures it is well know that by the association of Narada muni the hunter mrgari and Rathakara (Valmiki) attained auspiciousness. The foremost instruction of Ramanujacarya is this-If you cannot purify yourself by any endeavor whatsoever then just sit with the Vaisnavas and you will achieve all auspiciousness. By observing the pure characteristics of a devotee in a very short time a persons mind is changed and his attachment for sense enjoyment decreases and the seedling of bhakti sprouts in his heart.

By observing a Vaisnavas quality of not uselessly wasting time many people have easily given up anarthas such as laziness, oversleeping, useless talk, urge of speech, etc. We have also seen that by associating with Vaisnavas for sometime someones cheating propensity and desire for fame have been destroyed. We have seen with our own eyes that by associating with Vaisnavas with a little affection all other association such as attachment for prejudice has been vanquished. Those who are attached to winning fights, those who are expert at attaining dominion those who are eager to accumulate great wealth, all such types of people have attained Devotional service by being purified in the association of Vaisnvas. Without the association of Vaisnvas there is no alternative for rectifying the attachment for prejudices.

One should carefully give up attachment for material assets. People in general have spontaneous attachment for house household paraphernalia- clothes ornaments, wealth, wife, and childrens health. their own health, eatables, trees, and animals. Some people are so addicted to smoking ,chewing pan, eating fish , and drinking alcohol that their practice of spiritual life is obstructed. Many people do not respect the Lords remnants out of great attachment to eating things like fish. Because of the desire to contstantly smoke many peoples study of devotional scriptures, relish for hearing and chanting , and remaining long in the temples, is obstructed. Attachment for these things is averse to the constant practice of Devotional service.. Attachment for these things is easily destroyed by the association of devotees. Still one should try to destroy these petty attachments by fully engaging in Devotional service. By observing vows approved in Devotional service those attachments are vanquished.

By properly observing Hari vasara, ekadasi and the appearance days of the Lord those attachements are vanquished. The rules of such vows are the provisions for diminishing ones attachments.

One of the limbs of a vrata is to diminish the devotees propensity for enjoymentOne thinks “today somehow or other I will renounce but tomorrow I will enjoy profusely”, then the purpose of the vow will not be successful /. The reason is that vows have been prescribed to give up the association of such items by gradual practice. Vows are usually for three days. First by practicing vows for three days then by practicing for one month then by practicing for four months-in this way gradually one should completely uproot the attachment for sense gratifying items and leave them forever.

For those who desire to attain pure devotional service, the association of non devotees and women is mean to be given up It is extremely necessary for them to associate with sadhus in order to give up the attachments for prejudices. They must follow all vows meant for Vaisnvas in order to give up the attachment for material objects. One should not be negligent in these practices. One should follow these instructions with great care and respect. If one does not follow carefully then cheating in the form of duplicity renders the whole endeavor useless. For those who do not have respect in this regard attaining devotion to Sri Hari becomes very rare even after hearing form many births.

What is association and what is giving up association? Many people have doubts about these. Doubts may be there for if just by coming close to materialist or a material object is considered associating with them then there is no way to give up such association. As long as the material body is there how can one give up such proximity? How can a grhastha Vaisnava give up his family members? One cannot give up the association of deceitful person even if they are renunciates. One will have to come across materialists in ones life whether one is a grhastha or a renunciate. Therefore the limit for giving up the association of materialist is prescribed in Upadesamtrta.

“Offering gifts in charity, accepting charitable gifts revealing ones mind in confidence inquiring confidentially accepting prasada and offering prasada are the six symptoms of love shared by one devotee to another.”

O sadhakas one must accept proximity with both good and bad people as one passes his life. This applies equally to householders and renunciates. Proximity must be there, but nevertheless one should avoid mundane association. When the activities of giving and accepting charity, exchanging confidential talk, and exchanging foodstuffs are performed with love they are called sanga or association. Giving some foodstuffs to a hungry person and accepting some charity from a pious men are performed out of duty not out of love. Even if one engages in these activities with materialists that exchange is not considered association . But if one egages in these activities with pure devotees they are performed out of love. And when these activities are performed out of love that is association Therefore giving charity to pure Vaisnvas and accepting items or wealth from them become sat sanga. Giving charity to a materialist or accepting charity from one if done out of love become asat sanga. When a materialist approaches you whatever is required to be done should be done only out of duty. One should not speak confidentially with a materialist. Generally there is some love involved in confidential speaking therefore it is association. While meeting a materialistic friend one should speak only what is extremely necessary. At that time it is better not to exhibit heartfelt love. But if that friend is a proper Vaisnvaa then one should accept his association by speaking to him with love. This type of behavior with relatives and friends creates no hostility.

There is no association in ordinary talk. One should behave with ordinary people as one externally behaves with a stranger while buying something in the market. If one is obliged to feed hungry people, needy people, and teachers, he should do so as a host dutifully cares for his guest. There is no need to exhibit love. Care for them but not out of love. One should feed pure Vaisnavas with love and when required accept the remants given by them with love. If one can behave in this way while giving in charity accepting charity, speaking confidentially, feeding and accepting food with ones wife, children, servants, maidservants, strangers, and whoever else one meets there will be no unholy association, only good association. There is no hope of achieving devotion to Krsna until one give up unholy association in this way.

A grhastha Vaisnava should accept prasada grains and drinks in the house of another grhastha who has pure character. One should always be cautious about taking prasada in the house of a non devotee and one with bad character. There is no need to speak further abou this. Due to their pious activities those who have developed faith in Devotional service have a little intelligence by the mercy of Krsna Due to that intelligence they can easily understand essence of the acaryas instructions. Therefore only a few words are needed to instruct them. Those who have no pious credits have no faith. Even if they are given volumes of instructions they will not understand a thing. Therefore Rupa Goswami has given only a few words of instructions in Sri Upadesamrta.